The traditional parenting gurus have amazing advice. Some of them are absolutely brilliant. Wendy Mogel, Hal Runkel … seriously, there are some terrific, wise experts out there.
Whenever you listen to the traditional wisdom of the sages of parenting, remember to modify it for your kid!
More than a decade ago, Wendy Mogel (Blessings of a Skinned Knee) was speaking in Atlanta, and I asked her a question regarding a specific issue she was addressing — how does it work when your child has special needs?
She looked at me straight in the eyes and said, “it doesn’t.” I don’t know what else she said — I was so blown away. That’s when I realized that parents of kids with complex needs are on a completely different path from other parents.
It was a defining moment for me — to stop trying to fit my kid into the traditional parenting mold. She didn’t fit. I had to create a new mold.
So whatever your child’s issues are, when you hear parenting advice, you need to run it through your own filter — the filter of a parent who understands your kid better than anyone else! Trust your instincts, and everyone will benefit.